Thursday, February 14, 2008

Who Needs Forests?

Interested in seeing where a man’s interests lie? Look where he’s spending his cash. G.W. Bush’s latest budget is tight because lots and lots of money has to go to…..Iraq. Why? Because Iraq is ‘important.’ Where will the man get all this cash that goes to Iraq from? Well, he can’t raise taxes – that would be a no-no. He also can’t take it from his defense buddies and nor can he cut back the billions and billions in subsidies to the oil conglomerates because the poor, record profit conglomerates need the cash to pay the over-inflated bonuses of their fat cat bosses. The Raw Story reports that Bush is set on slashing the Forestry Service budget.

“Well look over here,” said Bush. “The forestry commission has a ton of cash - $4.43 billion to be exct. What the heck – I mean, what the blazes does a forest need cash for?” He exclaimed, scratching his head. “I know, let’s slash the forestry budget.”

“But s-sir..” stammered an aide. “Forestry fires destroyed $2.2 billion dollars worth of property and killed 10 people.”

“Ahh people shmeeple!” Said Bush. We’ll allocate more of the cash to fighting fires but reduce the budget overall.”

“Where should we divert the money from to increase the firefighting budget?” Asked the aide nervously.

“Let’s see…” said Bush, reading very, very slowly. “What’s this word here? Pree-venn-shun? Why’s there so much money allocated for that? We’ll just take it from there.”

“but sir-“ started the aide.

“No buts, son. We’ll reduce the budget for prevention. No butts – get it – no cigarette butts. Get it – cos they like – START the fires. Heh heh.”

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